A New Book?

This year has been a little strange for me. I sort of feel like I closed the book on one part of my life and now starting another book. I've had parts/stages of my life that I've felt like it's a new chapter but this year feels different like all new.
Maybe cuz we are done having kids we have our three little ones now we get to watch them grow. Maybe it's cuz now I know for sure I'm strong and more confident about myself. Whatever the reason I feel like my life is beginning a new.

Another thing that has been weighing heavy on my mind is that this year marks ten years since my mom past. It also marks ten years till I'm the same age that my mom was when she found out she had breast cancer so I feel a bit at a cross roads tho it's not a type that I'm forced to choice one over the other, it's just straight on to whatever life has in store for us.

Round Three

Round One
About two weeks ago I went in the garage to do some laundry. I opened the door started to walk in when I heard a HIIISSS sound right by my ear, I turned to find a snake(black racer) right by my face(about an inch not even joking) it was going from the top shelf to the middle shelf of this unit that is right by the door. I stepped back and was jumping up and down going "O MY GOD! O MY GOD!" Now I'm not scared of snakes it just scared the hell out of me(that's putting it nicely). I then went on to call my father-in-law to come over and help me. Of course by the time he came over(which was only about 3 mins later) Mr. Snakie(as I've named him) was gone. I left the door open the rest of the day and any time I had to go into the garage I would open the door look in for him then go in. Mr. Snakie 1/ Me 0

Round Two
A few days later I again was doing some laundry and I saw his little head, hubby was home so I ran in the house to have him come try and get him out. M tried to grab Mr. Snakie but ended up pissing Mr Snakie off so he keep trying to bite M so M couldn't get him. Then Mr. Snakie managed to get away by going towards the front of the garage. Mr. Snakie 2/Me 0

Round Three
Today (again I was doing laundry) I heard Mr. Snakie close to my feet by the washer and dryer no less! He saw me and backed up to try and hide tho I saw him. I called my father-in-law but then went in the house to keep an eye on M while I waited, and Mr. Snakie managed to go hide somewhere else, I should have just stayed in there watching him so he didn't move.

So the total Mr. Snakie 3/Me 0....Next time!!

Time

Well it's been a month since I last posted not to bad I guess! Life has been.....crazy and heck it. Half the time it's almost 10pm before I get a real breather. I get moments here and there through out the day that I'll check my mail and check my forums for a few mins but nothing that I could really sit and do something. At the moment N and M are playing nicely, L is napping, and I don't have to start dinner for another 20mins so I'm taking this time to blog.

L is now 5 months old! Two weeks ago he was 16lbs 8oz, and he also get his first two teeth two days apart. He has rolled over, but only a handful of times, he's a very laid back baby! He LOVES to laugh and giggle. He also loves to babble and do raspberries which I still have no clue where he learned it from! He started solids a few weeks ago his fave(just like his siblings) is sweet potatoes. He's also had peaches, squash(which we think makes his eczema flare up), carrots, and avocado(which he HATES).

L 5 months old!

N turned 6! I can't believe he's that old! He's doing great in school and he loves it. He's learning so much. He also LOVES to learn about animals I mean really learn about them. He loves books that tell you all about the animals from were they live and what they eat to their physical attributes. And he loves learning about wild animals, sharks, snakes, lions, bats, bears, all those type of animals. He also loves to color! He's pretty much always drawing or wanting to watch a show about animals.

N coloring in his coloring pad he got from his best friend

M is doing pretty good too. She's been having some issues with not listening lately and also having drama over little baby things. Which has been very tiring on mommy's patience's. I'm starting to worry about what I'm going to do with her and preschool. Our preschooling this yr hasn't gone so well. Tho I'm sure having L hasn't helped at all, as we are all still trying to find a good schedule for everyone and everything. So do I do homeschooling Pre-K next yr(and I HAVE to be good about really doing school with her)or try and find a program for her. So that's were I am with that!

That's the short of life around here.

Resolutions

I need to write them out get them out there cuz I really want to keep them this yr!!
My Resolutions for myself
~Lose 10lbs(my end goal is more then that but if I can lose at lest 10lbs this yr I'll be happy)
~Send out my niece's and nephew's birthday cards/presents early!!
~Send out birthday cards to all the family members cuz I'm really bad about that!

My Resolutions for Bec's Bows
~Do some fun things for this yr
~Find ways to get more fans

Having No Blogging Love

I've thought about blogging many times over the last few months, but the desire has just been sucked out of me. The whole reason I started this blog was to make it easier for me to keep my family and close friends updated on the kids(mostly M since she was having so many things/dr appointments going on). More then anyone it was for my grandma since I was having a hard time finding a quite moment to call this way she could just jump online whenever she had time. Over the years I've been slacking but trying to update at lest every couple months. Since L came I was planning on being good and updating monthly about him. But that's the thing about plans they don't always happen.

At the end of Oct my uncle emailed me(and other family members)about how my grandma had been sick for a few weeks and has been in the hosptial. A few days later I emailed him back(since w/three kids it's hard to get a quite moment to hear or talk to anyone), I asked how she was and if she should get really bad let me know I would want to see her. He emailed me back saying she was finally eating, not much but eating so that was a really good thing. Then on Nov 9th(my mom's birthday) he called me to tell me she was getting worse and if I wanted to see her I should make plans to come pretty soon. At that time it seemed more like with in the next month come. The next 24hrs were just a world wind! After I talked to him I jumped on the computer tried to figure out a flight, where I could stay all that fun stuff. I had planned it for 4 weeks later since that was the cheapest. I called him back to let him know the plans when he let me know she had gotten really bad that night and I needed to make it sooner. We thought for a moment maybe that weekend, but since it was just a few days away the prices were crazy, so I planned for L and me to fly out the next weekend. She only made it a few more days to Monday the 15th, when I got the call from my brother she had passed away. I was and in all truth still am upset that I didn't get to see her or even talk to her to tell her L had been born. I'm sure my uncle told her, but I didn't get to. I hadn't talk to her since about 2months before L was born every other time I tried calling she didn't answer.

Anyways, my uncle was wonderful and held the funeral on the weekend since I would be in, plus it make it so one of my other cousins was able to drive in for it. It was a nice little ceremony. Since I've been home the kids and the holidays have kept me busy. Then add in that I really haven't(nor do I really have the emotional strength to) really truly deal and come to terms that my grandma-the last connection to my mom-is gone.

In short I haven't really felt like blogging nor did I feel like there is anyone left to read and care about it, but I've realized that really the blog is for me. If someone reads it that's wonderful(and thank you) if not it's ok!

Three Weeks Old

L will be 3 weeks old tomorrow, and I can't believe it! Part of me seems like it was just a few days ago we brought him home and the other part has a hard time remembering our family without him!

Trying some tummy time, he decided it was nap time again

It's been a busy 3 weeks for him. The poor little guy has been to the dr's once every week so far. Most of them all due to the fact that mommy seems to get way more worried about him then I ever was with his brother and sister. I don't know if it's cuz he's number three and our last or cuz of the scare of miscarrying with him when we first found out, we were surprise pregnant again! Anyways, here's what he's been up to his first 3 weeks of life!

At two days old we had his regular newborn check up, he was just a few ounces shy of being back to his birth weight. Then that Wednesday(at 7 days old) I took him back cuz he was still a little jaundice and I wasn't sure if it was ok or not. His belly button was also not healing right so they had to put some meds in it to help it heal. At 10 days old he wore his first cloth diaper! I was very excited, he's so cute in them. At 13 days we went back to the drs this time for his circumcision he was then 9lbs 4oz. At 16 days old we had to go back to the dr's to have them check his circumcision, which at that point it was still a little swollen, but the dr said it will go down in a few days. Well last night the swelling came back so today we went back to the drs, thankfully it's not infected just still swollen. We aren't sure why it seemed to go down then come back, but I'm just happy it's not infected! He now weights 9lbs 14oz, I can't believe he's already that big!

Cloth diapers
We are cloth diapering L and I'm pretty excited about it! Once his cord fell off I was finally able to use the cloth. Technically I could have used them before, but I was to worried they would rub on the cord and hurt it, so we waited. I got to use them for a few days till his circumcision then we used disposables again for a few days to let it heal some. Now we are back to cloth and it's really easy, and soo much cheaper!

L in his first cloth diaper(10 days old)

L is Finally Here!!

Last week I started getting lots of headaches and was going to bring it up to my dr at my next appointment on Thursday(the 26nd). On Tuesday(the 24th) after hubby and N had left to go to school and work and I had just doing some dishes and started to not feel well. I finished them up figuring my blood pressure was getting low and took my pressure. I was wrong it was really high(for me that is) so I figured I would just relax on the couch and see if I could get it to go down, meanwhile texting my friend to see what she thought. After 30 mins I took it again and it was down, but it was also about lunch time so I fixed M and me some lunch and again the really bad not feeling well came back and again my pressure was really high. This time I texted hubby about if I should call the dr I quickly got a "Yes" back. I called the dr and they got me in about an hr later with the midwife. Once at the office of course my pressure was back to normal. At first she want me to walk around for awhile see if we could get it to go back up(to see what the reason was), but she started asking questions one being if I've had headaches and I told her how I've been getting lots of them and they last all day.....That sent me to L&D to get monitored. I called hubby right away cuz it was getting really close to time to get N from school and the midwife said I would be there for a few hrs so he'd have to come get M too. Once there I had blood work done, an ultrasound and got monitored, in the end they sent me home after 4hrs, though we did get a little "scare" (the nurses were nervous) cuz my contractions(which I had been having for about a week before that) started getting about 5-10mins apart, but I was only 1cm so they released me. I was told if I had headaches again or my blood pressure went up I was to call again. On Wednesday I was getting little headaches but not to bad, Thursday night they were bad again, but I waited til Friday morning to call(I didn't want to spend the night in L&D unless I was having L).On Friday(the 27th) they got me in right away, and I got my regular dr he looked at me heard about my headaches and sent me right over to L&D to have all the test redone. This time we had a plan though. If all was normal I would do a 24hr urine test at home and bring it back on Sunday, if not I was staying. My dr also told me he would be there in a bit to see the results and check on me. Of cuz this time I didn't bring anything for me to do(not sure what I was thinking!), but hubby was at home in since we knew there was a chance of me going back to L&D. After getting there and redoing all the test, I still had a headache, so I had to stay till at lest 5 when the dr would be back. I started the 24hr test, and hubby came up to drop off my DS and a jacket cuz I was freezing!! At 5pm my dr came in and my headache was still there, though not as bad, he told me I was staying till my headache went away, he didn't want me to go home then end up coming back a few hrs later(plus we weren't sure why I was having them yet though he thought from high blood pressure). If my headache did go away during the night I could go home, but had to come back the next day(saturday) to turn in the test and get monitored till the results came in. About 1.5hrs later my headache was gone so I could go home, but I was to be on bed rest till the next day when I had to turn in my test.
On Saturday at 1pm I headed back to the hospital(this time with my DS, a jacket, and a book~just in case!) After waiting they found some protein in my urine so I was sent home but was told bed rest til my appointment Monday(the 30th) in the morning.
On Monday my dr checked me and I was 2cm and 50%effaced, but cuz of my on and off headaches, and the protein he said he wanted to induce me. At this point I was 38 weeks. We planned it for Wednesday(since that was his day at the hospital) and I would be a bit closer to 39 weeks.
Then it became who's going to watch M and N! We figured out to have Grandpa come in the morning when they were still sleeping, then my friend C come over around 10ish to take over till Grandma could make it which was around 1pm. Then if need be have Grandma stay the night(though we all really didn't think I would make it that long). We also realized that my friend T was off and she remembered me telling her early on how I wish she could get off the day I go into labor so she could help me through it, so she asked if I still wanted her there. Of course I did so her babysitter was able to watch her daughter, so she could be there with me.
On Wednesday(9/1) we got up at 5 so we could be at the hospital at 6am. M ended up waking up needed me at about 4:50am so I covered her back up and gave her kisses then ended up just staying awake, but it was great to see her right before we left. Once we got to the hospital I had blood drawn(yeah I'm a little tired off all the blood work so is my arms!!) They hooked me up made sure L was moving ok and started pitocin about and hr later. My whole plan was to try not to have any pain meds this time which is why I'm so glad T could be there and help. At this point hubby realized we forgot to do some stuff at home and to bring some stuff so I sent him home to take care of that thinking I would be fine alone for an hr. Well when he was gone the dr came in and wanted to brake my water, I was to scared it was going to be like with M and started really hurting and I would have no one to help me through the pain so I said we could wait a bit, so we did. About noonish my contractions started getting pretty strong I wasn't really able talk through them anymore, so they broke my water and amazingly it didn't affect the strength. At too they checked me again and I was 4cm I figured that's not bad I can do this. At around 5 my contractions were really strong and really close so we had them check me again, I figured I was like 8cm maybe 6 at the worst...nope I was still only 4cm. I was totally heart broken, I was in so much pain and keep thinking if I was 6-8 I could keep going, but still only at 4 and had been I can't do it. So I told them to get me Standol and then maybe the epidural about 40mins later. At this point my contractions were really strong and T was having to really talk me through each one while I held on to hubby will everything(poor guys hands!) Once I got the Standol I was still in "pain" but was able to somewhat relax in between. It was a lot different then with M and N, with them once I got Standol I totally went out and slept, this time I could feel close but the contractions kept me awake. Within about 10mins of getting the Standol I told them I wanted the epidural. The nurse had to check me before I could get it and I was now almost 7cm. They prepped me for the epidural which o my sitting up and having the contractions was soooo bad. They had to sent T out for that part so she went down to get a coffee since they told her to come back in about 30mins. I had to lean on hubby and the nurse was right there trying to keep me calm. The whole time I keep telling the poor guy he had to hurry up. I had 3 contractions during it and he had to stop each time. He gave me the little test shot to make sure he had the right spot, and then he let me lay down as he finished up taping it totally up my back and getting the rest of the meds hooked up. As soon as I layed down I totally felt pressure and told the nurse I feel like I need to push. She checked me and I was 10cm and ready! The epidural dr was just about to hook up the rest of the meds and asked her well should I hook this up then and she told him no. She told me not to push(let me tell you that was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do!) and told the desk to call the dr. I was yelling at my poor dr that he better get his butt there, and were was he, yeah I was not liking having to wait! I only took him about 5-7mins but it felt like forever. Once he finally got there he was telling the nurse that she got him a gown and booties that were to small I yelled at him(and I did yell) that he'd have to deal. I pushed 3 times all in one contraction and L was born! At this point T had no idea what was going on she ended up coming in just as L was born. I ended up pretty much not really getting the epidural(or at lest the really meds) I was just a little numb(like when your foot falls asleep when you lay on it to long).For the first time hubby got to cut the cord which was really cool for him. L did have his cord wrapped around his neck, but only once and nothing like N's. I did tear a bit, but the dr called it a skid mark, where most wouldn't give stitches but he did do one just to be safe.Logan Anthony was born at 6:05pm and was 8lbs 7oz and 20inches long. His brother and sister didn't get to see him till the next day cuz by the time hubby left (7:30) it was after visiting hrs(though the nurses said they would let them up) and it was almost bed time. I was a little sad, but they came the next day and M was the cutest. When they came I was still in a hospital gown and she comes in the room looks at me then sees L, then looks at me again realizing it's me goes "MOMMY!!" gives me a little hug and then runs over to L in the little "crib" and says "Baby L" it was so cute! N acted like he cared less, but he would keep coming over to him and watching him.We got to go home the next day(24hrs after delivery). The kids have been great with him. N loves to help with him, he's even tried to read to him once. M is more following and copying N, though she loves to give him his binky. She has been having a little jealousy, if hubby or me are holding L she'll sometimes says she needs that person, and will start crying that she really needs us. Otherwise L is a great baby, he sleeps through a lot which is good having two older siblings. He did end up having to switch formulas the first night at the hospital. I had sent him to the nursery cuz I was shaking soooo bad everytime I got out of the bed and I didn't want to be alone standing, holding him and start shaking. Anyways, it was a good thing, cuz he ended up getting really sick from the formula so the dr switched him and he's been doing great since.

L's Newborn pictureM and N reading to L